homeschooling

Thoughts on the Proper distinction between Law and Gospel

March 1, 2009 by Edie Wadsworth 24 Comments

Do you have a visceral reaction when you see the Ten Commandments posted in public? Are you an advocate for having them posted in public places, with the thought that it somehow constitutes a sort of victory for christianity? Maybe I’m just a particularly sinful example of a christian, but my visceral reaction to seeing the commandments posted is guilt and shame. I look at the list and don’t get very far down until the ‘law’ accuses me. I have been a very poor keeper of God’s law and I don’t particularly like the visual reminder of my failure. What’s more, I often wonder how the average Joe walking into the courthouse feels about the public display of this law of God? Does it move him any closer to God’s love and redemption? And why have we chosen this particular ‘word’ of God to hold up for the world to see and ponder?

Only since I’ve become Lutheran have I been able to admit my ‘disdain’ for the public display of the commandments. Lutherans teach that the only way to properly interpret the holy scriptures is to properly distinguish between law and gospel. In brief, the law is God’s moral law that has been written onto our hearts and that is summarized by the commands that we are to love the Lord with all our heart and love our neighbor as ourselves. The gospel is the good news of Christ’s all availing sacrifice for us by His death on the cross. The law demands perfection and brings death. The gospel proclaims forgiveness and gives life. The law accuses us of our complete failure to please God while the gospel announces that Christ has pleased God perfectly for us. The law tells me what I must do; the gospel tells me what Christ has done. The law, when properly preached and taught, pins me to the ground….leaves me no way of escape and forces me to see the reality of my complete depravity and wickedness before a holy God. The law has done it’s job when it has crucified me and left me for dead. The gospel of Christ then breathes new life into me with the sweet taste of forgiveness and absolution. Another has paid the price for my sin and He alone, because of His own death and resurrection, has become my atonement. But there can be no life until we have first been killed by the law. It’s a theme throughout scripture. Death brings life. The first shall be last. Scripture is nothing if not a paradox.

And lest I haven’t convinced you yet of the death that the law brings, read over the commandments. Have you broken them today? I, for one, have broken most of them. I have envied and lusted and coveted and according to Jesus’ definition, I’ve even committed murder. Most of us probably rarely make it through breakfast without butchering 8 out of 10 of the commandments, if we were honest with ourselves. So, why then, would God give us a list of rules to follow that He knew we couldn’t follow? Would He ask us to do something which He knew full well we could never do? Yes, in fact, He would. He would give us a list of laws to show us beyond a shadow of a doubt that we are incapable of keeping them. Any of them. Let alone keep them perfectly, as Jesus so eloquently insisted.

So when I see christians demanding that the 10 commandments be posted in public places, I wonder why. If we were going to post something about our faith, wouldn’t we want it to be the good news of Christ’s forgiveness? And do we want them posted because we wrongly believe that we are actually keeping them? The law of God alone, stripped of the gospel, does not produce faith. If we feel we are keeping the law, we become prideful like the pharisees. And those of us who know we’re not living up to God’s standards begin to despair. The law can never bring life even if it serves temporarily to control behavior. Only the gospel of Jesus can bring life. But we won’t know that we need Him so desperately without a harsh presentation of how miserably we’ve failed to measure up to God’s standards.

In a perfect sermon, these two go hand in hand; held in paradoxical tension. In most sermons I’ve heard over thirty years of being a Christian, the law was usually watered down to a more ‘keepable’ level and the gospel was presented as somewhat conditional upon my sincerity. Or even worse, after the gospel was presented, an altar call was given where I now need to come forward and pledge to do X,Y, and Z. The good news that was given to me was then partially taken away. God wants to gospel to have the last word. For ‘the gospel is the power of God unto salvation’.

So I say, memorize the commandments, teach them to your children, but take them down from the public square. And put up a cross or better yet, a crucifix. At least there’s hope in the cross.

Ironically enough, these very Lutherans who claim that God’s law properly interpreted cannot bring life, are also very serious about learning and memorizing God’s law. His laws are the perfect recipe for harmony and peace in this life….if we could only keep them. And despite the fact that we cannot, one can only get to that complete realization by trying. So the more I know and attempt to practice God’s law, the more it convicts me and shows me my sin. Also of note, is that Moses, who brought God’s law to the people of Isreal, was never allowed to enter the promised land, while Joshua, whose name means Jesus, led God’s people into Canaan. I say all that to say that we’re teaching our girls Luther’s small catechism. They’re still working on it, but I thought you’d enjoy hearing their recitation of the first five commandments and their meanings.

I also have very good news for you……Taylor’s CD’s are in. If you left a comment on this post, email with your address and I’ll send you a CD. If you did not leave a comment on that post, well shame on you. But I’ll gladly you send you one for $7 including shipping. Just send me an email with your address.

Have a blessed Lord’s day on this first Sunday of Lent.

Love and hugs and showers of blessings! Also go to my tumblr site and check out some fun craft room ideas. I see painting in my future.

One of THOSE days……

January 21, 2009 by Edie Wadsworth 30 Comments

Melissa, at the Inspired Room is hosting a link series called A Beautiful Life. I didn’t write this post for that, but after I read her blog this morning, I thought it seemed appropriate. Thank you for hosting Melissa and for always giving us inspiration.

Today was by far the lowest point in my homeschool journey. Mom said there would days like this. So did Lynn and Denise and Kelly and nearly everyone who knew I was embarking on this adventure. But you know how you always say to yourself, “Well, there won’t be days like that FOR ME…… ’cause I’m patient and creative and well for heaven sakes, I’m a trained physician. I can handle teaching a first and second grader phonics and grammar and math.” Pride goes before a fall. Everytime. I have a strong-willed child and by 10am I was locked in my bathroom sobbing uncontrollably. Trying to dial my sister’s number through a tidal wave of tears. Hoping that my children wouldn’t use a penny to unlock the doors and find me collapsed on the bathroom floor feeling helpless and despairing. Thank goodness Gina was home. And as always ready and willing to listen. And talk me down off the ledge. And remind me that every mother has been where I am. Sitting in a pool of her own tears and trying to find a way to pull herself together.

Funny thing is, I woke up yesterday with every optimism that we were gonna have a great day. We were to start studying the ancient Greeks. We were gonna make vases and warrior helmets and learn about Hercules and about the suffix -y and all kinds of fun stuff. But everything doesn’t always turn out the way we planned and have you ever started sobbing for one reason and then fifty more shove their way into your mind and heart demanding to have their ‘voice heard’ . Pretty soon, the reasons don’t even matter much.

Finally, I unlocked the doors and made my way back to the school room and two little girls doing their work and quietly wondering if mom was okay. We hugged and cried some more and I said to them as sweetly and honestly as I could, with tears still streaming;

I love you girls so much. And homeschooling you has been one of the most rewarding things I have ever done. But I can’t do this everyday. I’m exhausted from fighting with you on every little detail. Sometimes we just have to do it my way …..just because I say so. This can be so much fun if you’ll just cooperate and let me lead you. I apologize for getting so upset and locking myself in my bathroom but sometimes mom’s need to do that. We are so blessed to get to spend this time together. But we have to love each other, respect each other and you have to learn to be obedient and teachable. Should we start this day over?

They both say ‘Yes’ and want to start the ‘new’ day sitting on my lap. Which is just peach-y with me. Here’s a few things I learned in my ‘breakdown’ yesterday:

1. There are gonna be days like this.

2. Crying is an amazing therapeutic experience.

3. Crying for 2 hours straight is pushing it.

4. Homeschooling is not easy. It’s like 180 snow days in a row.

5. Sisters are God’s way of loving you right here, right now.

6. Blog friends are an amazing source of strength and encouragement. Thank you all for your kindness.

7. Wearing a lot of mascara has its downsides.

8. A husband who loves and understands you should never be taken for granted.

9. Parenting is way harder and way more important than any other job I’ve had.

10. Running while listening to this on your iPod is a great way to de-stress. Great song, Tay.

11. Honesty is good for children.

12. My girls find adding the suffix -y is just plain hand-y. When the word ends with 2 consonants, you just add y…one consonant–double the last consonant and then add y. Funn-y, huh?

13. There are very few things that are really important in life.

14. Helping your children become respectful and obedient is one of the important ones

15. I love Romans 8:26 which says the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know how to pray as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.

Okay now you really get to vote: 3 columns or stretch?

Rise and Shine

January 2, 2009 by Edie Wadsworth 29 Comments

It’s happened to me a several times over the past few years. I read a book or hear a sermon or listen to a talk that changes everything.

Or at least how I look at everything.

An epiphany of sorts. An ah-hah moment.

It happened when I first discovered Lutheranism. And the first time I read C.S. Lewis’ Mere Christianity. And the first time I heard about classical education. And after I listened to Dr. Steven Hein speak about ‘vocation’.

And then today. After I read Dumbing Us Down, written by John Taylor Gatto. It’s an expose on the hidden curriculum of compulsory schooling and it knocked me flat.

How many awakenings does one girl need in any given three year span? Stevie feels the same way and has forbid any new books for at least a month. He’s kidding. But I know what he means. It can be a little like losing your footing. Or like waking up from a deep slumber and being blinded by a very bright light that exposes all manner of short comings in your life. Truth has a way of tearing down the pretenses and straw men we’ve built.

And before truth nurtures your soul like a good medicine, it can be a bitter, harsh reality.

Growing up as a product of nearly 25 years of compulsory government schooling, I never questioned the institution. It seemed perfectly natural for 35 adolescents of similiar age to be quarantined together all day under the auspices of ‘education’. Away from the influence of their parents, grandparents, and community. And relieved of any community responsibility to serve the neighbor. To obey a set of prescribed rules where one is allowed to learn math only between 8 and 9, stop all learning when the bell rings, and use the restroom between 3rd period and lunch. The ‘institution’ then invades the sacred ‘family time’ by assigning far too much homework and thereby successfully further isolating children from the most promising influence most can hope to have—-their own parents. ‘They’ have taken the lion’s share of children’s lives by demand and we have grown so accustomed to the system that we wouldn’t think or dare to question the goals or motives or outcome. Gatto asserts that basic reading, writing, and arithmetic can be learned in 100 hours if the child is ripe for learning. So what is happening in the other thousands of hours? He taught for thirty years in New York City and was crowned with many glowing achievements. He seems fit to have an opinion.

He ponders the hard questions.

Why have we allowed them to capture nearly the entire childhood and adolescence of our children without so much as asking the obvious questions? The ‘pseudo-communities’ that schools forge, he says, lack real nurturing and love that families and real communities provide. And given the amount of time spent in school, after school activities, and homework…plus the time spent under the mind-numbing brain-washing effects of most television, it’s no wonder that our generation is frought with people who are addicted, divorced, lonely, and literally at a loss to make meaningful connections and relationships.

This ‘network’ created by people of similiar age or interest is a shallow excuse for a supportive environment that is conducive to growing healthy, happy, independent adults. The school system itself fosters dependance…..where we want someone to tell us where to go and what to do next. That’s what we’ve been doing all our lives. He makes the point that the system is designed this way because those dependant types prop up our economical system well….where the average high school graduate is most likely to work at Walmart or in fast-food. In that sense, he says, the system does exactly what it is designed to do. To make a society of people addicted to dependance and consumerism…..thereby ensuring the ‘big machine’ will continue. They will tell us what to buy. We will buy it. It works for everyone. Or so it seems.

This sort of pseudo-commmunity lifestyle is also sorely lacking in solitude.

Our kids have no time to play. Without homework. Or lessons. Or organized sports. Or electronics. And if they do have free time, they don’t know how to use it. Where are the creative, inventive, industrious children that could spend an entire afternoon amusing themselves with a roll of tape and an egg carton? Or heaven forbid a book with any more depth than Goosebumps.

As a result of growing up highly addicted to distraction, it took me many years to appreciate solitude. And to use it effectively. To learn a new skill. Or to read a good book. Or to sit and watch the sunset and appreciate the beauty all around us. Solitude is where the real ‘work’ happens. Where our souls are fed. And without solitude, our lives become a series of poorly linked events….without meaning or purpose. We’re addicted to distraction according to Gatto. And we’re teaching it to our kids. Or at least we’re letting schools and television teach it to our kids, all day long, as we sit by and wonder why we live in a society full of violence, drugs, pornography, a myriad of psychiatric illnesses, and addictions of all kinds.

We need meaningful relationships, a safe and stimulating environment in which to learn, and solitude——where the real learning happens. Most of our lives are filled with overextended schedules, very little solitude and shallow family relationships that are mostly based on the ‘next activity’. And I’m as guilty as the next guy. Homeschooling is sometimes a wonderful alternative , but it doesn’t ensure that the learning won’t be fragmented and devoid of real meaning. I will certainly not be interrupting anymore ‘in the zone’ playtime, which is probably where real-life math skills are learned, to require the girls to do another worksheet. I will no longer feel guilt or pressure to mimic the ‘school’ environment where the lines between math and history are so clearly demarcated. And we will take more field trips. To learn about sewing from a seamstress, and baking from a baker, and gardening from a gardener. People who have a talent or skill and are passionate about it are the best teachers. Which reassures me that my girls will at least be able to transform an old door from Goodwill into a killer sewing table…..and make the world’s best brownies…..and when all else fails, add lip gloss and ribbon. I do hope my love for reading gets transmitted. At least then there’s hope of lifelong learning.

So, this book has affected me profoundly. It has illuminated why I have struggled so much with certain issues in my own life. Parts of this book rang so true in my heart that I found myself at times full of emotion—-of regret for so many ‘lost’ years, and of guilt, for sitting by for so long and expecting someone else to do for my children what I can most effectively do. Whether they go to school or stay home with me.

Waking up from such a slumber is painful. The light is bright and hurts my eyes. I want to pull the covers back up and pretend it’s not morning. Just one more hour. Or five more minutes. But I know what I must do. I must brave the light.

And pray for mercy.

**********************************

I would recommend the book to you but I hate to be the one to disturb any good dreams. Be careful if you read this one. Approach with caution. It is powerful and will sound a mighty loud alarm.

BTW, he offers a glimmer of hope where schools are more locally controlled and does offer homeschooling as an alternative that seems to be successful. But for most of us, we must live with the consequences of the education we have received. And hopefully we will all continue to be self-taught and self-directed enough to fill in the gaps. And although I have very large gaps, I seem to have an insatiable appetite for filling them.

Let the Games Begin……I own Resolutions.

December 30, 2008 by Edie Wadsworth 23 Comments

The big clean-out/take-down has begun. It’s 9p and the only thing I can be sure of is that the American Girl accessories now have their very own slighty-used storage container. What a blessed gift to find an purse belonging to ‘Kit’ only to say to my daughter, “You know exactly where this goes, don’t you?” So this is what life is like in non-ADD land? And I’m not sure who loves the American girls more……Emme and Elea…..or Hank. He’s turning out to be quite the ladies man.
In between eating hard-boiled eggs (Thanks Michele) and protein bars and sorting through way too many AG doll clothes, I read some more in my new ADD book. I learned 3 more gems.

1. We ADDers must use retractable pens. The caps are otherwise too distracting and can disturb our already jumpy train-of-thought. I did not get the memo on that one.

2. We tend to let laundry ‘loiter’ in the laundry room. I love that. Not the piles but calling it ‘loitering’. ADD is so much fun.

3. We apparently have no business owning wire shoes racks. That extra step of making sure the shoe lodges onto its holder is enough to push us over the edge. We’re supposed to pare our shoe collection down to a bare minimum and then we get a pass……to store them ON the closet floor. I’m beginning to wander if I’m capable of running my own dishwasher. We probably let dishes ‘loiter’ too.

Then there’s the other book which I believe Jessica (from Musings) recommended. It is very provoking and has given me some much needed ‘inspiration’ to keep on trucking with homeschooling.

My neighbor and friend Leigh Anne has so kindly offered to come and help me in the school room tomorrow. I’ve been working in there already today and you’ll soon see why I need supervision. My mother usually comes to help me with such projects…..she’s perfect for the job. Focused, slightly irritable if I get off task, and such a worker bee. Leigh Anne has promised to fill the ‘slightly irritable’ portion of the qualifications if I find myself led off on a tangent by a stack of old pictures. Tough love, Leigh Anne. I’m not easy to wrangle in. My mother is probably so glad she’s in Key West.

Life with ‘Hanker Down’ has been so much fun. He got to play with another English golden this weekend and they were instant friends. Our dear friends Cara and Drew brought Brody over to play. He was a welcome playmate after the intense cold shoulder Scooter’s been giving.

Oh, and Elea wanted me to show you the Littlest Pet Shop Fitness Club. At least somebody’s working out this week.

And finally, here’s where a smidge of ADD comes in handy. I bought this cool scrapbook paper at Walmart this morning. At 5:30 in the am. Thankyouverymuch. I wasn’t exactly sure what I would do with it, but I got quickly inspired when I found myself facing a huge basket of 8,756 unrelated items that needed to be sorted through. I’ve got just the cure for that.

I used modge podge on the back and then hung the letters on the wall in random order in the school room.

There’s a whole page of each letter in all colors and sizes.

And oh my dear…..it turned out so cute. You must try this at home. Now don’t go asking technical questions like what happens when you try to take the letters off. Those of us with ADD seldom consider such consequences. We get inspired……and go for it! Anything’s better than the basket I was facing.

What’d ya think?

What do iced sugar cookies, knitting and G.K. Chesterton have in common?

December 13, 2008 by Edie Wadsworth 10 Comments

Here at our homeschool, we’re following a strict curriculum. Today’s goal: Bake Grandma Evadne’s sugar cookie recipe in the shape of stars….and ice them. Recite G.K. Chesterton’s A Christmas Carol. Make snowflakes while dancing to “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Clause”. Punishment awaits those who do not fully participate!

You must try this recipe. It’s fantastic and comes from the north woods of Minnesota. Of course it’s always better when Grandma makes it….but we had fun and they turned out fantabulous. (And as side note, my kitchen looks like a nuclear fall-out shelter.

Notice the vintage aprons that we bought this summer while we visited Steve’s family in MN…

and ta-da……the most wonderful Christmas cookies ever.

and to make this festive celebration more vintage…..my sweet mother-in-law sent me three beautiful pieces of hammered aluminum…..THE most beautiful pieces that I have received or collected to date…..

and as if that weren’t wonderful enough, she knitted the girls the MOST ADORABLE booties you have ever seen. EVER.

This led us to a grammar lesson about ‘how to write a thank you note’ which the girls thoroughly enjoyed. There’s something so grown-up about addressing an envelope. And don’t forget to admire the snowflakes…..thank you Sandy for the link.

So there you have it…..a wonderful evening of baking…..

and enjoying the festivities of Christmas.

We finished it off by watching ‘The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe.

C.S. Lewis is a genius…..and his mentor G.K. Chesterton was too. So enjoy the following recitation of his poem “A Christmas Carol”. And here’s a shower of hugs and kisses to Grandma for making our evening so special. We’ll eat a cookie for you.

P.S. Thank you to brother Jeff for the email he sent to Issues,Etc…..which apparently won us blog of the week…….Hitchkicks are in order, I believe.

Grandma’s Sugar Cookie Recipe

Beat together and set aside.

2 eggs

1 cup sugar

4 T. milk

Mix the following together like pie crust:

3 1/4 C. flour

1 t. soda

2 t. baking powder

1/2 t. salt

1/2 t. vanilla

1 c. softened butter (2 sticks)

Mix the egg mixture into the flour mixture. Roll out and cut into your favorite shape. Bake at 400 for 8-9 minutes.

For the icing, I mix 1 stick butter (softened) with 1 stick of Land ‘O Lakes margarine (softened, and don’t try to substitute some other margarine, K? just get the right kind) and then add 1 bag (2 pounds) powdered sugar and 1-2 T. milk, a pinch of salt and 1 t. vanilla. I then pipe the icing onto the cookies and sprinkle. Have a wonderful Saturday and happy baking.

Buns and jumpers……and other perils of being home all day……

December 6, 2008 by Edie Wadsworth 12 Comments

I have a good reason for posting these pictures. I’ll tell you in a minute.

First let me say that one of the major roadblocks for me when I was deciding to homeschool was what I’d like to call the denim jumper road block. Or what I call the ‘buns and jumpers’ factor. I do not own a denim jumper and if I did, trust me, I would not wear it well. I envisioned that everyone who homeschools wears denim jumpers and tight librarian buns and grows their own wheat and takes vows against electronics and laughter and makeup; none of which I was willing to do. Imagine my surprise when , after reading a few ~~hundred~~ blogs, I realized that it takes all kinds.

And ex-doctor/ADD/obsessed with all things fashion and decorating/ moms like me have our little niche in the homeschooling world. I found that there are in fact plenty of fun-loving, hip, classical- book loving women who have journeyed out into the homeschooling wilderness with nothing but our dry erase boards, laptops, lip gloss, a lot of good books.

So when my 16 year old daughter commented on my ‘uniform’, it gave me pause.

First let me say that she often mistakes my closet for the dressing room of Target. She shops, she tries things on, she leaves things lying on the floor, and never brings the number back. So when she meandered in to ‘try on’ a few things and came out wearing part of my ‘uniform’, I was aghast. My uniform is not a denim jumper, but it is a pair of lounge pants from Victoria’s Secret; the boyfriend pants with the bedazzled ‘PINK’ on the rear. And a stretchy mock turtle neck and wooly warm sweater from Target. I often vary the color of the mock turtle. But the rest stays the same. I wash it, of course—maybe twice a week. But that is what I LIVE in people. Everyday, until I have to leave the house.

So when Caiti said to me, “You can’t wear these EVERYDAY!” I say,

“Ummmm…..Yes. Yes, I can. I can…… and I do. And this is the one thing in my closet that is off-limits. Take the Fry lace-up knee boots and the Rock ‘N Republic Jeans and the Micheal Stars t-shirt and what-have-you……but for the love of all things cozy and comfortable…….back away from the lounge pants.”

And when the girls and I go to ballet or to Hobby Lobby, I exchange the lounge pants for jeans but often leave the top ensemble in place. This present lounge wear addiction that I’m nurturing did not come about overnight. I didn’t purpose ahead in my mind that when I started homeschooling, I would forsake all cute clothes and resort to one pair of lounge pants as my official ‘uniform’. It just happened. I do make an effort to change out of the lounge pants for a short time in the evenings. So my poor husband can at least get glimpses of the fashion guru he once knew.

So I don’t judge anymore. I’ve lost every judging right there is. I wear a loose (fairly fun and fancy free) bun almost everyday and my own special ‘uniform’—–lounge pants with a limited variety of tops. My very own version of buns and jumpers.

So scroll back up to the top and see my bun and then take a gander at the top half of my uniform. There you have it. Maybe I’ve just given up. Or at least given in—-to comfort.

Please advise…… before I start selling all my clothes and boots on Ebay. Is this a phase? Am I just taking advantage of wearing lounge pants because I can. Will I grow weary of lookin’ like a lazy college student who doesn’t understand that PINK flannel PJ bottoms does not constitute proper outerwear? BTW, there is nothing more disappointing to any husband than to see a Victoria Secret bag that houses oversized lounge pants and a hoodie. Look on the bright side, it could be worse. It could be a matching track suit. I see a good new years resolution coming on here.

And if I seem a little over-dressed for church…..well, cut me a little slack. I’m making up for a weeks’ worth of lounge pants. If it’s any consolation, I’m still wearin’ plenty of makeup. And all manner of hair products. When that ceases, by all means, intervene.